


Diamonds and Rust: An ATF conversation

by Raven (Temaris)



Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: ATF AU, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-19
Updated: 2010-06-19
Packaged: 2017-10-10 04:48:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/95653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Temaris/pseuds/Raven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>First published March 13 2006 at <a href="http://www.journalfen.net/users/raven/84670.html">Journalfen</a></p>
    </blockquote>





	Diamonds and Rust: An ATF conversation

**Author's Note:**

> First published March 13 2006 at [Journalfen](http://www.journalfen.net/users/raven/84670.html)

****

_Well, I'll be _

\-- Hey, how are you? -- _God, how long has it been, three years? four years? Four, just that, since we fought that last time, and I walked away._

\--I'm not doing bad. You? -- _You sound different. You sound like the man I used to know, the guy who was a hero, decorated vet., the guy who I would have done anything in the world for._

\--Good, good. I'm glad to hear it. -- _God, I forgot how much... It's burning here, you know, salt and fire, and I'm reduced to just listening to you talk, how about that? You talking, me listening, and all I can think of is how glad I am you can't see my face. _

\--Sounds interesting. Your kind of thing -- _Or it used to be; maybe it is again, now. God, Chris. You sound alive again. Not like that ghost that haunts me on moonlit nights. You know, I'm holding onto this damn phone so hard it hurts, like I could stop you hanging up. Like I could ever stop you leaving. I should just put the damn thing down now, before I ... _

\--So, where are you calling from? What are you doing out there?-- _Not that I should be surprised. You wrote your own rules. Now you've convinced the feds to pay you to keep on doing what you always did. I'm, yeah, I'm glad for you. Glad you've moved on a little. I wonder how you're doing, who you're with. I wish--_

\--What? No I -- _No. There's nothing that you can say will make me come back. You don't really want me to come back, not the way I want it. I would..._

\--You say that, Chris, but I'm not a fed. I'm too old; too set in my ways. I like working here. Just for some sense that you owe me-- _Don't, not just for old time's sake. I don't know that I could bear pity._

\--Well, tell me what it is, then, Chris? Tell me it's not some sort of misplaced nostalgia, tell me what you'd call it. Because I'm not hearing, you're the best man for the job. I'm hearing, Buck, come back me up like always. I'm not that man any more -- _I'm not that man any more. I've learned to live with the ghosts. I've learned to wear that shirt once in a while, and not think about the birthday you gave it to me; learned to not see the scar on my chin; learned to watch the snow fall and not miss your arms around me. I learned these things long before you threw me out of your life. Every time I thought it was the end, it seems you want to change the rules again. I liked forgetting. I don't want to remember. We both know what memories can bring._

\--Chris... -- _I can't. I can't do this. It tears at me to say no, but you don't need me. You don't want me, not really, and the time has gone when we could capture that again._

\-- Okay. When do I start? -- _And I'll still do anything for you. Shit. This time it's going to be different, Chris. This time, you don't get to rip me apart, abrading old scars and handing me nuggets of joy that turn into fool's gold in the morning. That's done._

\--Yeah. I'm looking forward to it too -- _what am I doing. What am I doing?_

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this snippet has been bugging me off and on for months. It started out, I'd hear the song shuffle through and think, that is such a Chris/Buck song. Well, apart from the bit about the poetry and blue eyes, but none of the rest fitted so well for C/V, and yes, I really did contemplate writing it for C/V.
> 
> Anyway. Yes. This isn't a songfic. It's very heavily influenced by Blackmore's Night's version of Diamonds and Rust. Okay, fine, it's songfic *grump*. It even has a line of the song inserted in it, but not in the versedump sort of way *grumpgrump*.
> 
> Oh, and it's in a weird format too. Stuff between the -- -- is speech, the rest is thoughts. I'd love to know if you think it works. Because some days I think it does, and some days I don't.
> 
> Anyway, having thoroughly put any potential readers off, you can move along. With any luck at the very least I've stopped the damn things going round and round in my head, and maybe I can get on with something else. Oh, er, and if you don't know the song, it's not exactly cheerful.


End file.
